TV Tuesdays 6: Dry humping
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Welcome to the sixth installment of TV Tuesdays!
Are we on week three of Ginny & Georgia? Yes, we are. I’m sorry! My ability to binge shows is currently severely diminished by unremitting ADHD and Bubbles Empire Champions/The Lady Queen (15 more hours of female Medieval monarch goodness). I have made it to season 2. If you couldn’t tell from, or didn’t notice, the title, this one is gonna be pretty unsafe for work/my parents.
Here’s the deal. Porn gets a lot of guff for teaching people (men) how to fuck badly. If the porn doesn’t start off with a blowjob or penetration you often get like three seconds of awkward kissing, and maybe 30 seconds of rough, fast, dry fingering before the “main event.”
And let’s talk about the word “foreplay” for a second. I hate it. Why in the name of patriarchy is penis-in-vagina considered the main event of sex when the vast majority of sexual encounters are aimed at orgasm, not conception, and 70-90% of women never orgasm from PIV alone? EXPLAIN THIS SHIT.
Anyhoodle, mainstream porn gets a lot of shit, and it should. Truly. But you know what’s worse, and gets watched a lot more than porn? Mainstream TV and movies.
How many times have you seen a “love scene” that consists of 10 seconds of hot kissing followed by implied penetration? Then one or both people orgasm after two minutes at most or the scene either cuts out to sometime after sex?
If I were looking for someone to blame for men expecting women to be biologically capable of enduring penetration without pain (much less want it) after a minute or so of kissing… I’m looking at you, mainstream TV and movies.
Ultimately, it’s not TV’s job (or porn’s job) to provide sex education. However, it is nice that shows like Ginny & Georgia are helping to normalize sex acts that labies (my new gender-neutral word for labia/vulva havers) enjoy by simply depicting them.
Possible spoilers ahead.
For example, the first time Ginny and Marcus have sex it follows the typical TV sex scene script. A few seconds of kissing and 30 seconds of rough fingering lead to a minute or so of PIV. Except instead of that sending Ginny into ecstasy, Ginny is obviously unsatisfied and disappointed. Like I feel in real life when that happens.
Then in another scene later in the show Ginny and Marcus dry hump! And she really likes it! These are high schoolers. This is so much more realistic. I did SO MUCH dry humping in high school. True, I was Evangelical. And, frankly, I still love dry humping. Extremely underrated.
Or when Ginny teaches Marcus how to finger her. That’s the kind of shit that really happens. Men don’t come out of the womb knowing how each vulva likes to be touched. Plus it can change over time.
You know what else seems blatantly patriarchal? The porn/not porn distinction. Ignoring the fact that the actors are supposed to be 15 year olds, I found the dry humping scene 1000x more arousing than 99% of “hardcore” scenes.
If porn is material that’s supposed to arouse one sexually then why is explicitness the deciding factor? For me, and for many people (probably disproportionately women), arousingness and explicitness are not that tightly correlated. Not to get too pedantic/nerdy, but definitionally eroticism is as much about the hidden as the displayed.
So anyways, my babies, I like how G&G depicts sex and I hope more mainstream shows and movies follow their lead.
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